The Fishbones Skank Up Beauty Ballroom

Some billions of years ago, the universe spawned. There is much debate about how it happened exactly, but it’s safe to assume that most agree it happened. Things progressed in a fairly haphazard manner, and eventually humans came about. Once again, hotly contested yet metaphysically agreeable. More importantly, however, was an invention of these hairless monkeys. The ability to revamp environments and build news one, domesticate animals and plants, and turn a pig into bacon were all magnificent revolutions in their own right, but I am instead referring to the distillation of funk. Its appearance ushered homo sapiens into a golden era of existence, only paralleled by their growing tired of Furbies (…OH WAIT). Much as other important events throughout history have ambiguous origins, so does funk. Granted by the gods? Forged from fairy and (James Brown’s) angel dust? Some propose a genesis more supernatural, but at the end of the day we can never be sure.

Whatever its origins, we can all agree it came from somewhere and its impact was felt nationwide, from the Big Apple to the streets of Los Angeles. The latter of these notably birthed several legendary funk-masters- with few surpassing the monolithic Fishbone. I might have talked about how long they’ve in the industry, but by their own information it could be anywhere between 25 and 34 years. In either case, what’s undisputed is their accomplished ska-infused discography and a stage presence so entertaining that they’ve maintained a cult following since the 80′s. Not just anybody can pull such a feat off. Not even Val Kilmer.

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Listen. I like you. You’ve gotten this far in a blog post so riddled with dated pop culture references I might as well call it Edward Nigma. You probably have a nice face, which is why I’m having a hard time recommending Fishbone’s set at Beauty Ballroom on Monday. They will assuredly blow it off with sheer funk and raw talent. If you have low self-esteem, though, and really don’t care about your facial longevity (or have a great taste in music), I have no choice but to encourage you to skank away. Skank away, friend.

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This show is all the more face-destroying with a chance to win a pair of free tickets on Do512 and opening acts Outlaw Nation and T-Bird & The Breaks. Check out T-Bird and company rock the Do512 Lounge (best enjoyed while drinking a cool Shiner):

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